In 2017, Toy Burton posted a Facebook post in honor of her sister DeeDee’s birthday, who had died by suicide at age twenty-three. A former coworker saw her post and reached out; her brother had died by suicide that week and she was at a loss for what to do and how to get through this grief. Toy turned to the internet to look for resources and support for suicide loss survivors. “Being on the websites of those who focused on suicide prevention, I got angry because I didn’t see anybody who looked like me,” Toy shared.

Based in Roxbury, she felt she needed to create something that connected her own community to suicide prevention. That year, she formed the first BIPOC focused suicide prevention organization in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts: DeeDee’s Cry Suicide Prevention and Family Support. Named for her sister, Toy added ‘cry’ to the name as she “felt like people are crying and no one’s listening.”

Initially, Toy’s goal was to bring DeeDee’s Cry to different community events and establish herself and the organization as a resource. Their first event was a neighborhood Easter Egg Hunt. As she promoted her event around the community, she got pushback on folks not understanding the connection between a family gathering and suicide prevention. “The people that I wanted to reach were those who wouldn’t go to a mental health symposium. I wanted some place where people would just bring their families and be able to see what their table is about,” Toy explained. The event was a success, with attendees including City Counciler Ayanna Pressley, an early support of the work of DeeDee’s Cry.

Being a suicide attempt survivor herself, Toy knew the importance of supporting others and finding community amongst those who understood the experience. She created I’m Still Here, a virtual support group for those who have considered or attempted suicide. From there, the DeeDee’s Cry network continued to grow, and Toy continued to expand her offerings, pulling from her own life experiences and from those in her community who reached out for support. Currently the organization runs seven different support groups, including Man2Man – a safe space for BIPOC men to connect and support one another; Life After Loss: a safe space for those who have lost a loved one to suicide; and Hitting Back Through Healing – a virtual support group for anyone impacted by domestic violence.

Alongside their presence at community events and their ongoing support groups, the DeeDee’s Cry team serves as a LOSS (Local Outreach to Suicide Survivors) Team in the Boston-Area. LOSS Teams respond to those directly impacted by a suicide loss who are in direct need of support, guidance, and deescalation to prevent increased risk of suicide. Each LOSS team features at least one volunteer who has lost a loved one to suicide, or survived a suicide attempt themself.

The DeeDee’s Cry team does everything they can when responding to a LOSS Team call, providing not just emotional comfort and healing resources, but practical support as families and individuals navigate their grief and loss. “Everybody’s support needs are different,” Toy acknowledged, “One family, their sixteen-year-old died in the house. The support they needed was help moving out of that house; they just didn’t want to stay there anymore.” They connected that family to housing support services, standing side by side with them as they navigated the relocation process.

Now in their fourth year as a grantee partner of The Lenny Zakim Fund, Toy is grateful for the support that LZF has offered DeeDee’s Cry over the years. “What I love about LZF is that the funds are unrestricted, so they can go wherever we need them to go… We don’t have that flexibility with some of our other funds… [Other funders will say] we won’t pay for your men’s group, or we won’t pay for the domestic violence support… none of that is suicide prevention. But men supporting men is suicide prevention… Supporting domestic violence survivors is suicide prevention…” Toy clarified.

When asked about what has makes DeeDee’s Cry accessible and impactful to their community, Toy explained their approach straightforwardly: “Consistency.” People see DeeDee’s Cry around their community; Toy places decals on her car and on her home, she posts consistently online and shares her story to those around her, community members know Toy and the rest of the team live in their own neighborhoods and are going through the same things they are. It is an organization “run by us, for us,” Toy affirmed.

Through all their programming, the goal remains the same, “let people know they’re not alone.” Each February, the organization holds their Mental Health While Black Summit, where folks share their stories of survival, recovery, and happiness. “A lot of times, people think they’re the only ones going through something,” Toy disclosed. She has seen the impact that sharing stories of hope has on those who hear them and are able to realize someone else has been in their shoes before. “When I was in that frame of mind… all I could see was the hurt and pain that I was feeling… I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel… I couldn’t see the life that I have now.” As they approach their tenth year in operation, DeeDee’s Cry continues to be that light for countless Bostonians and their families.

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The DeeDee’s Cry team seeks volunteer support to support their LOSS Team efforts, as well as to share their resources and programming around communities of Boston. Learn more about the work of DeeDee’s Cry Suicide Prevention and Family Support on their website. All of their support groups are free, virtual, require no intake, and open to all.